Thursday, 1 October 2009

.................A New Meme - It'd Been a While.................

This one stolen from My 2 Cents who in turn klepto'd it from Sunday Stealing this week we have the Alpaha Meme.

My roommate and I once: tended each others wrists cuts. Those that cut together - heal together.

Never in my life have I: not looked at a Catholic personage and fought down an urge to beat them hard with a dense, blunt object.

High school was: where I honed my self-loathing and chronic distrust of others. Wanna be my friend still?

When I’m nervous: I find a leather bar and start dancing around the room as Glenda the Goodwitch from the North. Thankfully, those boys know how to burst a bubble.

My hair: resembles a tennis ball left out in the sun for too long - frayed and patchy. Got you hot yet?

When I was 5: I decided that vaginas were not my thing..

When I turn my head left: I see yet another closet large enough to stash a body.

I should be: Feared. People tend to want to explore their fears..............wanna map?

By this time next year: I will have lost enough fat, gained enough muscle, and achieved such a higher level of financial security you will beg me to own you............... I will politely decline.

My favorite aunt is: the one who had to learn humility by cleaning houses and toilets recently.

Funny - my mum did that for thirty years and the aunt thought it beneath her - who's gagging now bitch?

I have a hard time understanding: why I always leave a witness behind.

You know I like you if: I leave you behind as a live witness....... oh so THAT's why :)

My ideal breakfast is: Experiences of regret sweetened with vestiges of hope.

If you visit my home town: Do not ask about what happened in the barn - with the school vice captain - some saddle oil - and me.

If you spend the night at my house: you will earn your entrance, your meal, and your freedom.

The animal I would like to see flying besides birds: Elephants - I had a soft spot for Dumbo.

I shouldn’t have been: so lethargic with the gimp I own. That fukka only took it to the wrist..... of three different men. I think he's just stopped trying.

Last night I: Counted my targets chart. There is a new face I swear I didn't put in - mind you there was that psychotic episode.........

A better name for me would be: He Who Will Care Until Your Mistake Turns Me Into The Bitch Who Stalks You Like A Cure For Vag Rash.

I’ve been told I look like: The guy that stands outside your bedroom window at 3am - the resemblance is truly uncanny............ btw......... that's a lovely night stand you have.

If I could have any car, it would be: A top of the line Holden Statesman - room in the boot for six good sized cadavers.




MJ said...

A better name for me would be: He Who Will Care Until Your Mistake Turns Me Into The Bitch Who Stalks You Like A Cure For Vag Rash.

I feel itchy now.

Tom Gaylord said...

i LOVE this meme... I might steal it if you don't mind? :)

Damien NZ said...

Oh Mistress - secretly you love it :)

Tommylad - Off you go :)

The Mutant said...

What if I wanted you to own me? You'd make an exception, right?

Surely a Caprice is more your style over a Statesman - all the boot space but more gangsta cred - plus more leather, if you're into that kind of thing!

Wonder Man said...

love this meme, we are learning more about you