I think I may have covered this already in the blog but I was asked by someone recently when they found out I had worked in sexual health. So here goes one more time.
This is not an easy thing. We all get a bit flippant about this - but lets look at the realities.
First of all lets talk about Semen - Cum, Spunk, Protein Cocktail, Man Juice, Spirit, Load et al. These are just SOME of the estimated 500 colloquial titles for ejaculate. I like Cum. Simple - one syllable.
Here is the Wikipedia description of what Semen is composed of..........
The components and contributions of semen are as follows:
|testes||2-5%||Approximately 200- to 500-million spermatozoa (also called sperm or spermatozoans), produced in the testes, are released per ejaculation.|
|seminal vesicle||65-75%||amino acids, citrate, enzymes, flavins, fructose (the main energy source of sperm cells, which rely entirely on sugars from the seminal plasma for energy), phosphorylcholine, prostaglandins (involved in suppressing an immune response by the female against the foreign semen), proteins, vitamin C|
|prostate||25-30%||acid phosphatase, citric acid, fibrinolysin, prostate specific antigen, proteolytic enzymes, zinc (serves to help to stabilize the DNA-containing chromatin in the sperm cells. A zinc deficiency may result in lowered fertility because of increased sperm fragility. Zinc deficiency can also adversely affect spermatogenesis.)|
|bulbourethral glands||<>||galactose, mucus (serve to increase the mobility of sperm cells in the vagina and cervix by creating a less viscous channel for the sperm cells to swim through, and preventing their diffusion out of the semen. Contributes to the cohesive jelly-like texture of semen.), pre-ejaculate, sialic acid|
Okay - so that is what it is made up of. Now let's talk of what ELSE can be in it.
Semen is like any fluid in the body in that it can serve as a medium for whatever virus, or transmissible infection that one may have. This can mean everything from the common cold, flu, any type of STI including HIV - but excluding the HPV virus which is present on the skin in the wart and ***generally*** not inside the primary duct of the penis.
Firstly - one should NEVER cum in someone's mouth WITHOUT giving some notice. If you do - you are a rude bastard who deserves to have someone spit your cum back up on your cock - pretty picture for a pretty selfish act.
It has been my experience that MOST gay men don't mind swallowing - but like to make the decision themselves. Please don't force it on someone unless that sort of scene has been agreed to beforehand.
The most common reason NOT to take cum in the mouth is due to a perception of cum being ill-tasting. Just like sweat and spit, cum will take on different flavours depending on the types of food you eat, level of exercise (burning fat - catosis - will thicken the consistency and taste of fluids in the body), illness, and drugs. Prescribed medication and recreational drugs both change the taste of cum giving it a metallic, somewhat sickly sweet, taste.
Here are the issues - pros and cons - with spitting:
- It "double splashes" cum over the gums. This increases the risk of contracting an STI *if* there are any cuts or sores (ulcers etc). The oral cavity is usually quite well protected by a mucous membrane that is your saliva. Brushing your teeth just before sex is NOT recommended as it can open up the gums and cheek tissues. Swish mouthwash instead.
- If you have had a rough session, there may be extremely small cuts on the lips which could then increase transmission risk.
- It TOTALLY ruins the moment and there is NO classy way of doing this.
- It increases the sense of FLAVOUR in the mouth because you are splashing the cum back over the palate and tongue. If there cum is bad tasting - you could be on a short ride to Vomit Town = population YOU. Gross but accurate.
- Generally the penis is some way back in the mouth when ejaculation occurs so it will generally miss the front half of your mouth where the bulk of micro-trauma is usually located due to eating and chewing.
Here are the issues - pros and cons - with swallowing:
- Feels fantastic for the person being swallowed - come on - you know it and I know it - HEAVEN !!!
- It DOES add to the sexual event.
- For true cum lovers it is a necessary act in sex. For them it is not just physically satisfying, but many admit to a psychological high from it.
- Swallowing takes the semen straight from the mouth and down to the stomach where your stomach acid will kill 99% of any virus or bacteria - including HIV.
- If their cum is not a great taste - you will have minimal in the mouth - thereby lessening the taste.
- There is a possibility that the quantity will make you gag - if they are a heavy cummer - this gag response coupled with a bad taste has often led to people vomiting. Lovely - but true.
- If you are someone who experiences reflux on a regular basis - your throat will have a significant level of micro trauma which can increase the risk of STI transmission.
Now - to finish - let's talk micro-trauma.
Micro-trauma is exactly as it sounds. It is the trauma suffered by tissue that is not visible to the naked eye. When you eat, brush your teeth, bite the inside of your cheek or even engage in really rough, heavy kissing, you will experience micro-trauma. This is why many HIV educators tell people NOT to brush their teeth before sex. If you want to be minty fresh, use mouthwash. OH! and don't forget to drink plenty of water. Remember, the majority of the causes of bad breath start and end with a rotten stomach - yogurt + water = happy tummy and less chance of bad breath.
Also, remember, your hands are the number one site of micro-trauma on your body. If you have cuts or sores on your hands, sex probably isn't something you want to be doing anyway.
At the end of the day - if you are concerned by this - get on the web - do some research - talk to your GP or local HIV education organisation and then make an informed decision as to whether to spit or swallow.
Remember - where sexual safety is concerned - *technically* there are no bad or good decisions - only informed and uninformed decisions.
And don't forget the 3 R's of sex...............
Ready - be ready in your head as well as your crotch to have sex. If you are in a bad state psychologically - probably NOT the best time to go out searching for cock.
Responsible - The key issue here is communication and agreeing what to do and, more importantly, what NOT to do. It is YOUR choice whether to have safe or unsafe sex - but be honest about your status and discuss **before** you put your penis in someones bum/pussy/mouth or vice versa.
Respectful - Remember - it is not YOUR choice what someone else is willing to do or when they can stop. No means no - even during the middle of full-on fucking. You don't know why they want to stop - it could be that they are just not having a good time - or it could be something more serious like a psychological reaction for some reason. Whatever the reason, if someone says no - you stop. End of story. If you don't, you are then in the state of being known as "Statutory Rape" - and that carries prison time.