The Talents I Have Wasted....

I was just having a discussion with Bubb about the inability of CBS and Paramount to get a Star Trek Series back on TV.  I told him if I knew how to write a script I could do it.  I am a hardcore Trekkie.  I can name the parts of a MARA and tell you how it works and why the propulsion works the way it does. I can take you on a verbal tour of the Alpha, Beta, Gamma and Delta quadrants and its governments, species, and even some interesting astronomical phenomena.  I know the story types and characters they want to see and even what the four critical ingredients are for a good Trek series.

I floated my idea that has been around in my head for years to Bubb.  Gave him the grand over of what I would do.  He nodded and said "That'd be good.  You could do it."   I responded with "I could...... but I won't".  With a regretful sigh he agreed.

Now this is NOT me being down on myself.  It is facing an issue I always seem to end up at yet again - my inability to finish things.

For example.

My Novel About Australian Mutants
Amazing characters.  All deeply fleshed out characters with interesting personality traits, abilities, histories, quirks and interpersonal relationships.  Battling a small group of evil individuals who wish to kill humanity.  Guess what.... 8 chapters in and nowhere to go .............................

Star Trek Exodus
A completely finished novel.  Set about three years after the return of Voyager.  Brilliant characters including a cameo of Admiral Janeway.  Some surprise returns of amazing secondary characters who thrilled us all.

Sits on a USB stick.

My Music
So far I have written
5 Symphony Sketches for Full Orchestra based on themes drawn from Ballet.

A Bach inspired Invention for keyboard/harpsichord

A Celtic Aria for 2 Harps and 1 Dramatic Soprano (Think Cecilia Bartoli)

And that's the stuff that is finished.


My Script
Based on that little world I call Suburbia.  Sex.  Drugs.  Racial Identity.  The diverse range of relationships and marriage that can occur.  Its even got a dildo loving Catholic Priest.  4 pages done.


The simple truth is that I have been blessed with more talents than I can put in one blog post.  No - I am not being self centric or pompous or spinning gold into hay.  It's true.


I............................just........................can't..................finish.....................anything............

One thing I know about this is that the person I love in my life is saddened and disappointed by this.


Me - I feel like every idea and project I work on gets writers block or fizzles out or I just get bored.  Mostly bored if I am brutally and uncharacteristically honest.

As blessed as I am and I guess you could call it that, there reaches a point where I just can't be bothered.  There is probably more to it.  But that's it.  And it's not easy to confess.

There you go.

My life is quite full of REALLY interesting "could have beens".

Some languor because of no money.  Others due to no connections.  But mostly due to no responsibility from me.

And it's a shame.

That's it.  Thank you for listening.

D
xox