Profile - A leatherboy lets us into his world................Part 2...

Well today is Part 2 of our profile of Leather Boy Ben who certainly generated some interest last time he was here.

I love these insights into others and their lives.

For more on ben - Visit his blog - link in sidebar.

So with a huge thank you to Ben for putting himself out there again. Here is Part 2.

Enjoy.

PS Aint he just the cutest little boy :)

(Q) As people, we seem to be almost voyeuristically interested in what other people do, even if it’s something that we ourselves don’t get into. Do your friends know about your interest in bondage and submission? Are they into this type of play or are they more vanilla? Do they pepper you with questions?

All of my friends know about my sexual interests: gay, straight, men, women, all of them. I have always been very open about it. Part of it is the belief that I allow myself to get much closer to people when I am honest about the things I do/want. The other part is my desire to make BDSM less taboo. I don’t want people thinking they need to be ashamed or speak only in whispers. The more we all talk about it casually, the less taboo it becomes, and the more comfortable others feel in exploring their curiosities.

Having said, yeah I get peppered with questions all the time. Not only from my immediate friends, but also people I barely know. I am fairly well known among DC’s young gay community as the resident kinkster, and people send me messages on facebook all the time asking me about types of play, asking advice, etc… It’s always from vanilla people, which I think makes it all the more important I answer as best as I can. Most want to try, but some of my closer friends just ask because they want to understand what is important to me. And though, in many ways, they will never truly understand…it means the world to me that they try.


(Q) Are your current experiences in submission / bondage and leather play something that will be important to you in a relationship? Is a non-submissive relationship something that appeals to you?

Not only is my leather lifestyle (a term I am using to encompass EVERYTHING (sex, play, submission, etc…)) important to a relationship, it is crucial. I don’t want a boyfriend. I want a Sir. I need a man who can compliment and satisfy my emotional need to submit, as well as my sexual need to be Dominated.

I know a lot of times people get swept up with someone and end up in a relationship that doesn’t fulfil those needs, and I am not saying that will never happen to me. However, I can say that I don’t want that to happen to me. I know what I need, and a vanilla relationship could never satisfy those needs. I could go on, but it really is as simple as that.



(Q) WHen you first started exploring the scene, did you find yourself besiged by offers due to the lack of other younger guys in the scene?

When I first started? Hell, I still do!

Actually, when I FIRST started exploring the scene I was rather unpopular. I mean I was 14, so not many guys were beating down my door. Once I turned 18 and moved to DC is when things really picked up. Ever since then I always have a steady stream of guys messaging me, in large part because I am young.

I talk to a lot of young boys (and tops for that matter) who experience the same thing and complain. To be honest though, I take each message as a compliment. Even if I have absolutely no interest in having any sort of sex with the guy, I always send a message back thanking them for their kind words and for their offer. I can’t stand when young guys are bitchy and rude to older men who aren’t so good looking. It actually really pisses me off and I have gotten in fights with a few of my friends over it.

(Q) There doesnt seem - at least in my experience - a lot of younger guys into the leather / BDSM scene, why do you think that is?

Honestly it’s a question I don’t really know the answer to myself. A lot of guys don’t get into BDSM or kink until later in life. At least that’s what people tell me. I got into it when I was 11, so I don’t understand it myself. Everyone is different though. And I guess for most people, it takes longer to explore this.



(Q) Do you like dating? Is romance something you enjoy? Some seem to think that if you like a bit of kink or leather, one isnt into romance.

Haha, have you read the blog!? I LOVE ROMANCE. I am such a helpless romantic. I have very few experiences with men who are very romantic at all (though Greg certainly is, which is a fun new adventure all in itself), but I have always injected the relationship with romance from my side.

What I really love is being sweet, and showing a man just how much he means to me. For me, this has never been hard to reconcile with my leather identity. Quite the contrary, I use my fetishes to complement my sweetness.

This example should sum it all up. Back when I was still with (not actually together, but you know) David, I really wanted to do something sweet for him and being that he was such a hot Daddy…what better day than on “Daddy’s Day”? hehe. Obviously this is my bastardization of father’s day, but given the context of our relationship I thought it worked really well. So I stole one of his paddles when he wasn’t paying attention one night, and had it engraved with the mirror image of his initials. That way, when he spanked me his initials would show up on my bum. I also made him a card that was a perfect blend of innocence and kink. The front said, “To the world’s best Daddy”. On the inside I taped in my old driver’s license (because he always loved the picture) and wrote: “Who else could take care of such a cock sucking, sock sniffing, piss drinking, cum guzzling, nasty boy like this?”. On Daddy’s day I got dressed in my new boy scout uniform that I had bought just for him, and took the subway down to his place. I knocked on his door, and when he answered, greeted him with “HAPPY DADDY’S DAY SIR!” Suffice to say…he was a very happy Daddy that day.

Maybe that isn’t standard romance, but its what works for me.


(Q) How goes the feedback from the blog? Are you surprised by the feedback or is it the type of feedback you were expecting? Or did you not have any preexisting idea of what would happen?

I don’t get much, to be honest. Which is a shame because I really love getting feedback. Tony Buff and his boy both got a lot of emails in reaction to my blog when I was featured on Tony’s… but no one emailed me hahaha. I don’t know why.

The feedback I do get is all positive which is nice. To be honest, I wasn’t expecting anything one way or the other. Still, I am learning that I really love hearing from my readers. So much so that today I posted a brief blog entry encouraging people to leave feedback or email me. I even decided to start posting open thread discussions. So we will see.



(Q) One last question, tell us one thing about boy Ben that would surprise us :)

Hrmmm… that’s hard to say. I will say, when I am not out being a good leather boy, I am a total geek! I love reading comic books, reading video games, watching anime. To give you a brief idea of just how geeky I am:

I am the DC area’s reigning Buffy Trivia Champion. I won a tournament at Fantom Comic’s two years ago and haven’t lost since.

Last Friday I went to a finale viewing party for Battlestar Galactica. It was epic.

Last night my boyfriend on my favorite anime died and I literally cried for ten minutes. He was a big, beefy, bearded daddy type; and I was (and remain) rather distraught over his passing.
So yeah, boy ben is a big geek.

I don’t know how surprising that is.

(D) Its actually very surprising - and somewhat endearing :)

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