Top And Bottom - My First Bareback

One of the topics most discussed here is barebacking.  I thought it was high time I shared my first experiences of that myself - as a top and as a bottom.

My first experience with barebacking was as a bottom.  I was 19 and knew this guy who was a regular at the bathhouse/sauna where I was.  He was also active in the gay community as was I.  We had played around a few times but never done any anal because he was a top only, and at the time so was I.

One night at the sauna we saw each other and even though we both played with others that evening (it was buddies night - LOTS of people) we kept flirting with each other HARD.  This wasn't how we usually did things.  He would either walk up to me and say "wanna eat?" - he liked to be rimmed and had a magnificent arse, perfect bubble - or I would say "blow me" - he loved to suck dick and could teach a master class.

Anyway, it was later in the night.  I had been with someone and so had he.  We were talking and he just started lightly rubbing my bum (I had a towel on - his hand was outside the towel).  It felt quite nice.  Quite gentle and friendly.  I myself don't mind rubbing my friends bums or having them rub mine.  He took my hand after a while and took me into a room.  We started doing the usual stuff and he turned me over and began rimming my ass.  This wasn't something I had known he was into.  In fact, he had said he was not one to rim at all.  He wasn't really good at it I remember.  But after a while he started rubbing his dick up and down the crack of my arse.  I told him I didn't get fucked and he mentioned it was a shame coz he loved my ballet arse.  He kept doing that for a while and then replaced his dick in my crack with a finger in my arse.  It slipped in with NO problem.  A first for me.  And it felt G-O-O-D.  I even asked for another.  Then another.  He was finger banging me with three fingers.  I remember his exact words.  "Three fingers equals getting fucked Princess."  He got a condom, lubed it, and entered.

OWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!

What the fuck was happening?  I went from heaven to hell in like three seconds.  He had even taken his time.  Why was I feeling pain??? He withdrew.  Added more lube, and tried again.  Same result.  I said "Take off the condom" without missing a beat.  Now I knew this guy in an *okay* way.  We were socially active together and volunteered together, but I wasn't a close friend.  But *I* asked him to fuck me raw.  And he did.  And it was B-L-I-S-S.  As soon as the head started to go in it just felt right.  And he began fucking me.  And fucking me.  And fucking me.  Every position for probably over an hour.  I had heard of his prowess.  It was justified.  On my back.  Legs around his waist.  He began pounding my prostate and I came everywhere.  Without assistance.  He then pulled out and shot a HUGE load all over me.  We snowballed our mixed cum and took our time in afterglow.  It was fantastic.

My first time as a top about a year later.  I had met a guy through friends helping them move house.  This guy was moving into them in the new and larger house.  It had been a long, exhausting day and randomly commented that "I don't think I have the energy to catch the bus home."    He looked at me and said "Don't".  Long story short.  Pizza.  Showers.  Then we were in bed.  I had been rimming him and began humping his crack getting ready to fuck him.  We had a condom and lube ready by the bed.  But I just slipped in. We both stopped.  And he just nodded.  So I kept going.  Started up a rhythm and went to town.  I had never felt anything like it.  Now ordinarily, my cock would go a *tad* less hard.  Not soft.  But about 3/4's hard when wearing a condom.  Fucking him raw my cock was rock hard.  And we were both loving it.  BUT - I couldn't last long.  It was a total sensation overload.  So I came inside of him.  After I did, he pushed me off and began to clean my cock off with his mouth.  I had NEVER seen or heard of THAT before.  And he got off jacking his dick whilst he blew me.

And that was the opening of Pandora's Box. 

After both of these times, I spent MONTHS fretting about HIV.  Multiple tests.  Lots of long nights.  And yet, even after the first time, I still did it.  And why?  Coz it felt GOOD.

In the 1990's this was the worst thing HIV educators feared.  We all knew it - yes I was an HIV educator for a period of the 90's - but we didn't talk about it.  It wasn't until a conference in 1995 when I was 23 that I heard the first HIV educator say "We have to accept that barebacking will continue in spite of the Pandemic for two reasons.  One - the breeders do it.  And Two - it feels good.  No one likes having to give up something that feels good".

I can look back on the years when I was single and see periods of me being a VERY good gay man - as in years of condom only sex.  But then there were the brief periods of raw sex that made me feel like a porn star.  It was a dichotomy that both excited and disgusted me.  I remember telling one of my educator friends about it.  He took me aside and desperately made me promise I wouldn't tell anyone.  He began to explain that I would get into "trouble" and I would be blacklisted from volunteering for any LGBT group in our community.  And yet - I *knew* others were doing it. 

This was my earliest experience of slut-shaming.

And it still hasn't gone away.  20 odd years later and even with the many discussions we have about the ethics of sex, we still slut shame and bareback shame.  Then we Truvada shame.  Etc etc.  The shame is still there.

Which is why we still have to continue to discuss barebacking.  Even in a time where it is almost common place.

The shame is still here.

What a sad state of affairs for us still.  And we do it to ourselves. 

Something to think about.

D
xox

Amazing Article from Men of Porn...

This is a very intelligently written article.  Please read this and discuss in the comments.....

Kudos to our blogger friend at Men Of Porn.

Of Testing and Bareback Porn (probably too long you won't read but you should)

written by Alias74

Recently the internet sparked with the gay porn bareback debut of previously "condom-only" performer Trenton Ducati for self described "international porn powerhouse" Lucas Entertainment. This past Friday marked part two of his flip flop bareback scene with porn god Blue Bailey. And then hirsute sex pot Charlie Harding not only recently posted a first time "bottoming" clip on Men.com but also shot a bareback clip with power bottom bareback extraordinaire-bear Mike Dozer over at Jake Cruise Media. Harding, in addition to tweeting his heart-on about the shoot, issued a statement in the form of a post on his personal blog.

Based on the direction that the gay porn industry is going, it really came as no surprise that Ducati and Harding have joined the ranks of previously mainstream gay porn studio performers who have jumped the velvet rope from condom-only to bareback. And frankly, an astonishing number of recent performers have done so: many to polarizing reception by fans and bloggers - Villification on one hand, praise and support on the other. Ostensibly neither event is HUGE news. The leap to bareback for both seems to be a career trajectory rather common amongst MOST if not ALL of the popular gay porn stars of the last decade or so: that of, doing a number of scenes at condom-only porn studios, even taking to the soapbox to strongly advocate condom use and vociferously objecting to bareback on both moral and health implications, and then BAM….bareback time!

It is precisely that direct "about face" - in the context of all those nagging rumors and stereotypes (with a hint of truth...maybe?) about our beloved gay porn stars in general - that is currently making Harding, Ducati and by extension Lucas Entertainment the target of shared criticism. In the wake of the press release and his first bareback scene with performer Blue Bailey (an out HIV positive porn performer), fans, bloggers and commenters have speculated about Ducati's status, labelled him an "immoral hypocrite", and announced that he has a death wish. Harding's announcement is too recent to tell reaction but judging from his Twitter page it's a supported choice, but if you check out some of the Facebook and blog comments, it's more of the same vitriol-slinging.

One day testing at SC according to Ajay (@ Queerlick)

Those opposed to bareback also claim that viewers who watch it and popular stars like Ducati and Harding engaging in such practices will emulate him in bareback sex, further boldly stating that the future infections of said viewers will be on their heads. There's also a bizarre contingent of folks claiming that Ducati is LYING to his fans by saying the testing and shooting of this scene was "safe", primarily because of the incongruity of Ducati and Lucas Entertainment's assertion of a "safe shooting environment" and the fact that Ducati’s scene partner Blue Bailey is openly HIV+.  

Lucas Entertainment, founded and run by porn superstar Michael Lucas, has taken the brunt of the "hypocrisy" criticism of late. Once a vocal proponent of condom use in porn, Lucas and his company did a similar "about face" recently adding bareback sex scenes allegedly between "real life" lovers. Lucas also took to the internet in a now famous op-ed opinion where he came out as HIV negative and in support of the use of the HIV treatment medication Truvada in the controversial Pre-exposure Prophylaxis regimen (essentially the regular use of retroviral HIV medication by those with a current negative status to prevent future infection of HIV). All of which just made the pitch forkers and torchbearers go nuts - they all but roasted Lucas as opportunistic and advocating the slack millenial attitude of pill popping one’s way to ignorant bliss and dangerous indifference. I'm just WAITING for the article by Zach Sire that calls him  and Lucas Entertainment "murderers, slinging toxic body fluids".

In his statement, Ducati says "until now I had not found an environment that I felt was dedicated enough to safety and testing." Curious because this hot cat has worked for the BIGGEST studios in the past - Titan, Dominic Ford, MenAtPlay, High Performance Men, Falcon, Raging Stallion, Suite 703, Men.com. And again with the rumors - I personally spoke with a performer some time ago who wished to remain anonymous and indicated that mandatory testing in the gay porn industry would effectively end the careers of many porn stars who are HIV positive. Other performers I spoke to as well wished to remain anonymous and claimed that the studios they worked for NEVER tested them and merely just gave out condoms and turned the camera on.

Harding's well written blog post essentially boils down to the following: Ducati’s decision to do bareback is a personal, calculated risk analysis assessment. The assumptions critics make about the HIV status of performers who engage in bareback production is frankly a private matter between scene partners and whom the performers have sex with off camera. To borrow a phrase from "Facebook": "Not for public consumption." Harding follows these points by saying a) if you hate bareback, don't watch it because b) I'm going to do it and will continue to do it based on my choice which has nothing to do with the critic’s assumptions. He also makes the point of being HIV negative having been tested seven days prior to his writing of the blog post (AND after the filming of his bareback scene with Mike Dozer) claiming it is for a shoot coming up one week after publishing of his statement.

As Beetlejuice would say: "So what do we have here, kids????"

Here are the facts:

1) Lucas Entertainment is continuing to produce bareback content, moving away from the “real life lovers” theme it previously presented.

2) Ducati is suitably impressed with Lucas’s testing procedure enough to sign a three month bareback contract.

3) Ducati’s first bareback scene partner is Blue Bailey who in a previous interview with Treasure Island Media dated October 1 of this year came out as HIV positive.

4) The production date of his first bareback scene is unknown.

5) Harding advocates choice to perform in bareback porn based on personal risk assessment through testing.

6) Harding has shot a bareback scene.

7) As of his blog post, Harding is HIV Negative

8) Harding as per an article is in a relationship with an HIV+ partner.

Here's what we DO NOT know:

1) While Ducati makes reference to status sharing (one of the first performers to even MENTION that phrase EVER in an official press release, a procedure long rumored to be in practice in the industry), it is not clear whether or not the performers and Lucas Entertainment ACTUALLY engaged in any HIPPA compliant status sharing between Ducati and Bailey .

2) Because we have no idea what Lucas Entertainment's' testing procedure is, Ducati's press statement about Lucas Entertainment being "dedicated to enough to safety and testing" really is just press fluff at this point, and shouldn't imply that shooting for Lucas Entertainment is the safest bareback gig in town for performers.

3) What the term "informed bareback" really means, which seems to be a melding of "informed consent" and "pre-tested bareback". Without knowing just how the studio is educating performers in risk assessment and management associated with barebacking in porn, the phrase is effectively meaningless "pap".

We have NO IDEA what Lucas' testing procedure is nor has any studio out there ever deigned to disclose what EXACTLY they do to ensure the safety of the performers and educate them about the risks and making an informed decision about performing in bareback scenes. Yes...there are disclaimers on studio websites that talk about the tests utilized, how accurate they are, and how these studios claim to not endorse bareback sex but want you to subscribe to watch it. And while these tests, pricey and sometimes DNA/RNA based, can detect exposure/infection within a shorter window of time, they are essentially POINTLESS without a quarantine on performers' sexual activity between testing date and the actual shoot. (incidentally I know of only ONE studio that copped to instituting quarantine procedures. Hint: It sounds like a name and doesn’t feature the letter "Y" and does not have the name of a fish embedded in its name). Harding's blog post is demonstrative of why "pre-scene quarantine" is essential. In Harding’s statement, he claims an HIV Negative result from a seven day old test for a shoot coming up in a week. I hate math but I think my feeble mind has calculated that the shoot will be FOURTEEN days AFTER Harding's test which is effectively fourteen days within which Harding could engage in sexual practices which could expose him to STI’s including HIV before even a single camera starts recording his scheduled scene. And that goes for his scene partner as well.

Ducati's statement in the Lucas press release at least gives me hope of a nascent dialogue within the gay porn industry to finally bring to the forefront things that seems to be missing (if all those rumors and tweets are to be believed) -  responsibility, informed consent, and status disclosure. Fronting the term "informed bareback", Ducati states that Lucas Entertainment's testing procedure is about "explicit, open communication and status sharing among the models...creating a space for performers that ensures them full information and consent".

Admittedly the Lucas press release over this scene smacks a bit of the kind of staged theatricality and chest puffing that comes with anything Michael Lucas is involved in, and as polite and well stated as Harding's comment is, based on the fact that some studios still refuse to book performers who do bareback, it's ultimately a self-serving statement.

Which brings us back to RESPONSIBILITY. And this is why I think Ducati and Harding going bareback and their statements might be a good thing for the gay porn industry: If the performers themselves are not being publicly candid about their status and sexual behavior off camera (and let’s face it, they don't HAVE to be nor are they obligated to publicly declare any personal information no matter how much us fans bitch and moan), and if the studios are not being forthcoming with exactly what testing procedures they follow or how they pair scene partners or even if they test at all, the statements of Ducati (who has flat out refused to disclose his HIV status) and Harding are certainly beneficial for the dialogue/discussion at large about performer safety and testing versus condom use.

Especially in light of the recent HIV outbreak that occurred in the statistically safe mandatory testing and recorded database confines of the straight porn industry. HIV positive performers appear to have contracted the virus from off camera behavior and NOT on-set. And at least for the straight porn industry, a dialogue began - performers, directors, studios came out in force to discuss testing and to take a stand on proposed government mandated condom use. Performers advocated bareback on free speech concerns and criticized the mandatory condom use as a political move to shut down the porn industry in the state of California. But there was NO such discussion on the gay porn side. Sure...there were blog posts and tweets but to the untrained eye, it was business as usual on the gay porn side of the industry, even as more and more bareback content was being shot and streamed and even as one of its superstars, Rod Daily, came out as HIV+ as a result of the straight porn outbreak.

No matter how many people jump on a soapbox or scream "murder", gay bareback shows ZERO signs of stopping. If anything, it's just gotten bigger and more popular. Open dialogues about these issues can foster more responsibility and informed consent in the industry. Not saying that gay porn HAS to convert to a testing and recorded database like the straight porn industry or HAS to have mandatory testing or HAS to suddenly be condom-only. But in order to ensure the "minimization of risk" to performers with regards to bareback, it MUST be a two way street - Studios need to have at a minimum education about STI's and HIV and proper hygiene, safety and production quality in place to ensure the safety of the performers, in addition to testing procedures if the studio wishes this as part of its production shoot. And that testing likely needs a smaller time frame of testing performers regularly and pre-scene quarantining procedures. But the performers themselves also need to be responsible - minimizing unsafe sexual behavior off-set, testing regularly themselves, and taking active steps to educate themselves and be informed of the risks so that they can make an informed decision about shooting porn, condomed or bareback. Performers should NOT leave their safety to the word of their agent or manager or director or studio heads who sadly are just out for their profit. I doubt anyone - performers, bloggers, studio heads, directors - can say definitely what the answer is to ensure the safety of the performers who risk their lives in the creation of a hugely profit-generating fantasy for our consumption that no doubt fills the wallets of studios, big and small.

But at a minimum, and based on Ducati and Harding's statements, maybe a dialogue is starting. And that my friends is a good thing.

Updated ... Bareback Poll Results...

Here are the results of the recent bareback poll ...

So .. if we take this as a representative sample (and I have a pretty broad blog base so I don't think that is too much of a stretch) ... only 35% of gay men are using condoms all the time.  Now this flies in the face of the message of sex educators who say that MOST gay men do not bareback.  Even if we add the 16% who are mostly safe then it only increases to 51%.  Now this is hardly MOST gay men.

Actually, if we look at the numbers above, then safe sex is actually decreasing significantly.  If we take it from the 50/50 mark, a total of  45% of respondents are using condoms only half or less of the time.  65% are choosing to bareback part, half, or all the time.

I don't know what to make of this.

Hopefully someone in the medical field can assist me with this but I don't know exactly how to interpret this.

I certainly look forward to hearing your comments and thoughts.

Shalom and blessings

Damien.

UPDATE - OK - so it seems I may have asked questions that were too open ended.  So I am going to put some thought into the design of better options - and more options - and then put a new poll up.

Lessons are learnt.

Why Do A Safe Sex Poll ? ....And a little msg at the bottom....

I like to do a safe sex / bareback poll every year.  The reason I do this is that I am fortunate in that as my blog is not targeted to a specific group or issue, I capture a broad cross section of blog visitors.  These people represent most of the areas of the gay community.

 There are those you use condoms 100% of the time.  Some of these ppl change their habits with a long term partner of the same sero status.  For those who like condoms 100% of the time - the two below are the ones that I have tried that couple passion and sensation with protection and reassurance.

There are those who bareback to various degrees but not 100%.

This is a valid choice.  And I would like to take moment just to point out some of the issues that this entails.

Obviously, aside from the other STI's Sexually Transmitted Infections - if you do choose to bareback - top or bottom - you will eventually catch the virus.  Yes it is easier for tops to dodge the virus due to the fact that MOST - but not all - Poz men on meds can achieve non detectable virul loads.  This basically means that there is less virus in the body.  BUT -there is STILL VIRUS THERE.  You can still catch it top or bottom even from someone undetectable.

Then there are those who bareback 100% of the time.

PEOPLE WHO CHOOSE TO BAREBACK SHOULD NOT BE TREATED WITH SCORN OR SHAMING OR INTERNAL HOMOPHOBIA.

What we should be doing is engaging in conversations about why they bareback.  How they negotiate safety or disclose their status - both neg and poz.  If neg, why have they conciously chosen to expose themself to a potentially lethal virus.

Now - some of the realities of the consequence of our little friend below..................................

THE HIV VIRUS

Not only does one now have the virus and the serostatus of Positive = POZ in our community (I really dont like that word but its none of my business I guess); but one also has the issue of managing a sometimes complex drug regime as seen below but also the side effects of these drugs.

Some of the side effects include :

HIV treatment can cause side effects for a brief period while it is controlling the virus in your body. Common short-term side effects include:

• Fatigue
• Anemia, a problem with red blood cells that may also cause fatigue
• Diarrhea, nausea, or vomiting
• Dizziness or headaches
• Insomnia
• Pain and nerve problems
• A skin rash
• Injection site reactions
• Dry mouth
• Weight loss
• Vivid dreams

These tips may help cope with short-term side effects:

• Fatigue. Try brief naps, cutting back your work schedule, eating balanced meals, and doing gentle exercise.
• Nausea and vomiting. Avoid foods that trigger these responses. Eat some crackers in the morning or try ginger (in ginger ale, ginger tea, or gingersnaps). Eating small meals and cold food may also help. Drink a lot of water to stay hydrated. Do not take antacids. 
• Diarrhea. Make sure to get plenty of fluids and stay hydrated. Talk to your doctor about over-the-counter anti-diarrhea products that are safe to take.
• Headaches. An over-the-counter pain reliever may help; stay rested, drink plenty of fluids, and stay away from loud noise and bright light.
• Insomnia. Limit caffeine, heavy meals close to bedtime, and daytime naps. Keep a regular sleeping schedule and try relaxing bedtime rituals such as warm baths, warm milk, soothing music, or massage.
• Rashes. Avoid long, hot showers or baths and skin products with alcohol or harsh chemicals. Try moisturizing lotions and sunscreen, and petroleum jelly on dry, itchy areas.
• Injection site reactions. Discuss injection technique with your doctor. Rotate injection sites, warm the medicine in your hands before injecting, and apply a cold pack after an injection.
• Pain or peripheral nerve problems. Wear loose-fitting shoes, soak your feet in ice water, massage them, and try ibuprofen or nonsteroidal anti-inflammatories.
• Dry mouth. Suck on sugarless candies or lozenges or chew sugarless gum. Drink plenty of liquids. Avoid sugary or sticky foods or caffeine.
• Weight loss. Talk to your doctor or a nutritionist about ways you can maintain a healthy weight. For example, high-protein shakes as well as other products high in protein and low in sugar may be recommended for some people.

Remember: All these symptoms can be signs of an underlying problem unrelated to the HIV treatments. If symptoms are severe, prolonged, or accompanied by other symptoms such as abdominal pain, fever, stiff neck, or difficulty breathing, then you need to seek medical attention.

Coping With Long-Term Side Effects of HIV Treatment

Some side effects may last indefinitely or cause serious problems. Even in these cases, there is often a way to manage them so that they are less troublesome. Your doctor can help you with this.

Some of the most common long-term side effects and coping strategies include:

• Fat redistribution. Known as lipodystrophy, this can occur when the body changes the way it produces, uses, and stores fat. You might lose fat in your face and legs and gain fat in your abdomen and back of your neck. Switching medications may keep symptoms from getting worse. But there are few other options for treating this long-term side effect.
• Increases in cholesterol or triglycerides. This can increase the risk for problems such as heart disease. Diet and other lifestyle changes are a first step. Medications such as statins and fibrates may also be recommended by your doctor.
• Elevated blood sugar levels. Exercise, weight management, and other lifestyle changes may help. Your doctor may also recommend other medications to control blood sugar levels.
• Decreases in bone density. This can increase the risk of bone fractures, especially as you get older. Try weight-bearing exercises like walking or weight lifting. Your doctor may recommend calcium and vitamin Dsupplements, or medications to treat or prevent osteoporosis.
• A buildup of a cellular waste product. Known as lactic acidosis, this uncommon issue can cause a wide range of problems, from muscle aches to liver failure. You may need to switch drugs.

 Then of course there is the very serious issue of becoming AIDS positive. What is below is not pleasant.

NOW THE MESSAGE.....

I do this poll every year for two reasons.

1.   I do not APPROVE or DISAPPROVE of barebacking.  I approve of INFORMED DECISION MAKING knowing the potential consequences of your acts.
2.   Having been active in the original outbreak of the epidemic and losing SO many people, I seek to educate and advise on the consequences of informed decision making and the risk it brings.

I will NEVER shame or guilt someone who barebacks.  I may have questions for them, but that is it.

I will never not interact with those who are HIV Positive.  It is just a virus.  As a Clinical Depressive, I am not easy to deal with.  My friends accept that and work with it.  I can work with someone's serostatus and more importantly - the person themself.

I will never allow a blogger who uses the words - CLEAN, NEG ONLY, Please no Poz - to remain a blog-acquaintance or friend.

YOUR WORDS AFFECT MORE THAN JUST THE MOMENT.

My love to you all.

Make informed decisions.  Know the risks.  Weigh it all up and THEN make your decision.

Thank you so much for your time and patronage and input into this issue.  It is a very personal one for me and you all honour me with your knowledge, passion and insight.

My love, blessings and prayers for you ALL.

Shalom

Damien
xoxoxoxoxox

Fuck Friday... Safe .. Raw ... However ..

It's time for the annual poll of how you fuck.

Do you fuck with condoms only, bareback only, condoms most of the time etc?

Please go to the poll on the right to tell us how you fuck.

You can anonymously tell us in the comments WHY you choose to fuck the way you do.

Thanks all... this is an important one so as MANY PPL do it as possible.

Cheers

Damien
xox

Steven Daigel .... Cum Whore .....

So apparently Treasure Island Media - the no holds barred, no apologies given bareback studio - has recruited Rodeo Boy / Big Brother Contestant / Condom Porn Actor Steven Daigle into it's stable.  Although, they didn't have to work hard with Mr Daigle, he contacted them.  This is yet another example of once condom only adult actors crossing over to the dark side of bareback.

***insert Darth Vader March theme music here***

Personally, I have no opinion for or against.  As I have always stated on here, I approve of people making informed decisions regarding their sexual lives.  If this means they make an informed decision to bareback knowing the risks et al and do so in an open and honest fashion with their partner/s, then I support the decision.

This one is going to make some headlines in the community though I am sure.

Below is the box art....

The trailer for the movie can be found HERE ...... you have been warned that it is NSFW and no condoms are present (obviously).

Thoughts?

Shalom
D
xox

...2 Bare ..... The Bareback Poll Results Are In .....

...but first.... here is the original post.....

.......2 Know........."Wow - You're Obsessed With Barebacking"............

........... This was one line from a conversation I was having with someone about my most recent poll.....

Am I obsessed with barebacking? Yes. Because I want to understand it. I also reaffirm that here on 2 Cents Worth Down Under, I will never write for or against barebacking. It is not my place to approve or disapprove of peoples' individual choices.

Before I get into it - the simple plain truth is that sex without a condom feels good. End of story. For tops it has enhanced sensation with no need to pause the passion to put a dom on. For the bottom, it is easier to take a cock due to lack of the issue of friction that even a well lubed rubber can produce. Not to mention those with latex sensitivity/allergy. For those in relationships, it is described as the ultimate way to truly physically bond with a partner during sex.

.Now....Once upon a time in the 90's the resurgence of barebacking was a "push back" against a hardline culture of safe sex that was built on a foundation of shaming people who fucked sans condom. It was also somewhat rebellious in the fact that HIV took the "choice" out of whether to use protection or not and now imposed a measure of restriction that some people pushed back against. After the mass deaths of the 80's there was a quick and sharp response to the epidemic in Australia. Whilst the promotion of healthy and safer sex was comprehensive and very target group friendly, the response to those who admitted they barebacked was often harsh and disdainful. This was an approach, I believe, due in part to many educators and HIV health workers at the time who had suffered many losses. However, it was a tactic that ultimately failed.

In the early 2000's the psychology of barebacking shifted to a culture of the "gift givers" and "bug chasers". For me this was an alarming change of paradigm that I am still to fully understand. Whilst HIV treatments had certainly advanced by this time, they were still largely unsuccessful and the death rate was still significant.

Now in the 2010's barebacking has taken on an almost "extreme sport" culture. Just as in extreme sports where there is a significant risk of injury and death, it seems many view barebacking with a similar but morphed type of view. Given the permeation of the community with regards to HIV and STI information via the net, advertising campaigns and word of mouth/peer education, there are very few people who are truly ignorant of the risks. There is also a somewhat false view of the efficacy of treatments. Yes, treatments have advanced beyond what we initially ever hoped for back when I worked in sexual health between 91 & 95, but people are still dying. Non-compliance with treatment regimes. Uneven compliance. Genetic factors. Aggressive strains. These are all still killing people.

In 2009 (as supplied by the Mundi Index / Avert.org) there were 17,000 deaths in the USA, 1000 in Canada, 700 in Britain, and 100 in Australia. I reference these countries as they are countries with sophisticated and long term HIV health education programmes that have significant knowledge penetration into the community consciousness..... These are also countries where barebacking is now - depending on which source you speak to - the RULE not the EXCEPTION... Indeed, in my experience with sexual encounters, more often than not the bottom said I didn't 'have' to use protection if I didn't want to. I did, but was surprised at how few requested a condom. These were people from varied backgrounds, ages, professional and blue collar. Anecdotally, what does this tell us?

It says that at a fundamental, almost primal level, the safe sex message has failed. Why?, given that there are life threatening issues involved, how has this happened? What is it that has resulted in this behaviour becoming so wide-spread? Why have so many men, aware of the risks and consequences of HIV, chosen to engage in this behaviour?

The plain and simple truth is that there is no one answer... the answers - much like the virus itself - mutate and change faster than health education can keep up.

Shalom and Blessings to you all.

D
.

..........OK......... here are the results.....

• 55 (15%) - of respondents BB'd 100% of the time
• 63 (17%) - of respondents BB'd Most of the time - rubber-ed up if they had to
• 13 (3%) - of respondents BB'd About half of the time
• 38 (10%) - of respondents BB'd Yes but not often
• 11 (3%) - of respondents BB'd once in the last year
• 8 (2%) - of respondents BB'd - but it was an accident and the freaked out
• 98 (27%) - of respondents Never BB'd - unless in a committed relationship
• 71 (19%) - of respondents NEVER engaged in BBing

(PS Yes - I know the %'s only add up to 96 - but you have to take rounding into account)

So in a MACRO view ....

• 136 respondents - 35% - have barebacking as their primary or common sexual practice
• 44 respondents - 13% - have barebacking as an irregular practice
• 8 respondents - 2% - have barebacking as an accidental and unintentional act
• 169 respondents - 46% - have barebacking as a restricted and/or non-participatory practice
  

.........Now I have to say I was pretty surprised by this actually.... Given the anecdotal and qualitative evidence out there - I suspected the rates of safe sex to be lower than reported, especially reading my original post which was based on some 15 years of involvement in gay mens health in multiple capacities.....

...So where does this leave us? Easy - fucked up.

Now that was a pretty flippant remark - but by that I mean simply this... HIV is not going anywhere. It reinforces the belief that our safe sex message has failed and that human beings will truly be creatures of free will irregardless of whatever consequences may or may not be presented to them - even with fatality as part of the equation.....

So......... read this....... think about it.........talk about it........... comment on it.......

.... My parting comment is this - Yes I am obsessed with Barebacking.... because its cultural, social, sexual, psychological and individual impact can not be ignored... After all... it won .. and safe sex lost....

Shalom and Blessings to you all....

D
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PS Yes this was NOT a scientific survey using any of the standard data gathering formats - but it DOES give pause for consideration...........

PPS - I'm including Sean's comment here in it's entirety and deservedly so..

You make many interesting points and I applaud you for blogging about it. It only encourages people to think.

A few points:
People don't like to talk about sex and it is sorta a taboo to do so. So when sex results in emotional problems, abuse, std's and pregnancy, many just block it out hoping it'll go away.

Sex is like a drug, it produces a high, is addictive and the more you have (especially anonymous) or become addicted the more risks, i.e. BB, you take. Plus, many encounters will involve alcohol and/or drugs.

More eduction is needed about the risks of the medications. Even when the meds work on the HIV a significant number of people will have organ damage that can and does lead to poor quality of life or death.

In the US, meds cost $1,000 - $3,000 a month with out insurance and even if you have it it is still expensive and the quarterly blood tests are very expensive as well.

Hep B and especially Hep C are out of control and not very responsive to treatment yet.

Think about all the people who still smoke, drink, do drugs (both illegal and RX) and anyone who gets into a car. All kill as many if not more people a year then AIDS.

One final point, the percentage of heterosexuals who have condomless sex is probably 2-4x higher then gay men (in developed countries) so they ignore the risks as well (although it is significantly lower).

.......2 Know........."Wow - You're Obsessed With Barebacking"............

........... This was one line from a conversation I was having with someone about my most recent poll.....

Am I obsessed with barebacking? Yes. Because I want to understand it. I also reaffirm that here on 2 Cents Worth Down Under, I will never write for or against barebacking. It is not my place to approve or disapprove of peoples' individual choices.

Before I get into it - the simple plain truth is that sex without a condom feels good. End of story. For tops it has enhanced sensation with no need to pause the passion to put a dom on. For the bottom, it is easier to take a cock due to lack of the issue of friction that even a well lubed rubber can produce. Not to mention those latext sensitivity/allergy. For those in relationships, it is described as the ultimate way to truly physically bond with a partner during sex.

.Now....Once upon a time in the 90's the resurgence of barebacking was a "push back" against a hardline culture of safe sex that was built on a foundation of shaming people who fucked sans condom. It was also somewhat rebellious in the fact that HIV took the "choice" out of whether to use protection or not and now imposed a measure of restriction that some people pushed back against. After the mass deaths of the 80's there was a quick and sharp response to the epidemic in Australia. Whilst the promotion of healthy and safer sex was comprehensive and very target group friendly, the response to those who admitted they barebacked was often harsh and disdainful. This was an approach, I believe, due in part to many educators and HIV health workers at the time who had suffered many losses. However, it was a tactic that ultimately failed.

In the early 2000's the psychology of barebacking shifted to a culture of the "gift givers" and "bug chasers". For me this was an alarming change of paradigm that I am still to fully understand. Whilst HIV treatments had certainly advanced by this time, they were still largely unsuccessful and the death rate was still significant.

Now in the 2010's barebacking has taken on an almost "extreme sport" culture. Just as in extreme sports where there is a significant risk of injury and death, it seems many view barebacking with a similar but morphed type of view. Given the permeation of the community with regards to HIV and STI information via the net, advertising campaigns and word of mouth/peer education, there are very few people who are truly ignorant of the risks. There is also a somewhat false view of the efficacy of treatments. Yes, treatments have advanced beyond what we initially ever hoped for back when I worked in sexual health between 91 & 95, but people are still dying. Non-compliance with treatment regimes. Uneven compliance. Genetic factors. Aggressive strains. These are all still killing people.

In 2009 (as supplied by the Mundi Index / Avert.org) there were 17,000 deaths in the USA, 1000 in Canada, 700 in Britain, and 100 in Australia. I reference these countries as they are countries with sophisticated and long term HIV health education programmes that have significant knowledge penetration into the community consciousness..... These are also countries where barebacking is now - depending on which source you speak to - the RULE not the EXCEPTION... Indeed, in my experience with sexual encounters, more often than not the bottom said I didn't 'have' to use protection if I didn't want to. I did, but was surprised at how few requested a condom. These were people from varied backgrounds, ages, professional and blue collar. Anecdotally, what does this tell us?

It says that at a fundamental, almost primal level, the safe sex message has failed. Why?, given that there are life threatening issues involved, how has this happened? What is it that has resulted in this behaviour becoming so wide-spread? Why have so many men, aware of the risks and consequences of HIV, chosen to engage in this behaviour?

The plain and simple truth is that there is no one answer... the answers - much like the virus itself - mutate and change faster than health education can keep up.

Shalom and Blessings to you all.

D
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.......2 Poll........................Bareback Honesty..........

...............see the poll on the side - make your choice - it's anon so be honest.......

D.

....2 Bare..........Porn Actor aka Barebacking Hypocrite...........

.........Please read the below interview of Marc Dylan aka Chris Gabriel............

Newcomer Marc Dylan Talks Bareback, Condoms

August 25, 2011 | 57 Comments

***interview reprinted from Gay Porn Times - interview by JC Adams***

I had a chat this afternoon with Marc Dylan, a muscular newcomer with sexpics under his belt for Jet Set Men (the forthcoming ripped-from-the-headlines parody ANTHONY’S WEENER), Falcon Studios, Lucas Entertainment and Titan Media. He’s embarrassed about the VOD release of a condomless blue movie for SX Video titled BAREBACK ME, PLEASE that features him smack-dab on the cover (he is billed as Chris Gabriel). Mr. Dylan, 27, filmed two bareback blue movies—the other was for Treasure Island Media—before deciding that he’d rather shoot condoms-only. But with the release of the SX Video film, he’s concerned future directors, costars and others in the biz might have the wrong idea about him.

Mr. Dylan is repped by Howard Andrew and FabScout Entertainment.

JCA: What’s the timeline here? When did you film for SX Video and Treasure Island?
MARC DYLAN: I talked to them in early June. I had emailed a lot of companies and they responded first and offered to film with me. I was just really excited to get to try to doing porn, so I said yes. They shot with me in early July.

JCA: What was that experience like for you?
DYLAN: After my second shoot, I just really felt uncomfortable with the barebacking even though they pair negative guys together [after testing], so I declined shooting with them anymore, even though they made me a really good offer. Shooting with them was an interesting experience for my first time ever doing porn. They were nice and friendly people, but I just decided it wasn’t for me. About the same time, I started getting some interest from other companies that shoot with condoms, so I jumped on the chance to work with them. I really enjoyed the experience of doing porn, except for the barebacking, so I thought it was good timing.

JCA: What was it about shooting without condoms that made you uncomfortable? Can you talk about that?
DYLAN: In the beginning of August, one of my best friends found out that he was HIV-positive. He had been dating and got it from a boyfriend who was not faithful. Before that, I was just kind of embarrassed that I did the bareback porn since I’m pretty safe in my personal life. My friend’s whole life is changed now and I felt more guilty than embarrassed about the barebacking. He got something without knowingly putting himself at risk since he was in a relationship, and I knowingly put myself at risk just because I was too excited to try porn to wait.

JCA: Why did you want to speak up about it publicly?
DYLAN: People are always entitled to make their own decisions about bareback sex and everything else, but I don’t want to be seen as someone who thinks bareback sex is a great choice or something I do regularly. I got into porn because it’s something I have always wanted to try, I like sex and always have been a little bit of an exhibitionist. But I also thought it would be cool to see some new places and meet new people, and I was curious about what the people who do it are like, and how porn was made, since I watch so much of it.

JCA: Do you regret getting involved in the industry?
DYLAN: I’m really glad to be doing it because I’ve seen some really cool things, had fun, met some really nice people. A few are becoming good friends that I talk to almost every day or two. I just wish how I started was a little different.

JCA: Well, don’t beat yourself up too much about it. You tried something, you decided it wasn’t right for you.
DYLAN: I just wanna make sure people know that since I have done my first [condoms] video, I have not done a bareback video.

JCA: Anything else you want us to know about you?
DYLAN: Well, I live in Mississippi. I was born just outside of New York but I have lived here since I was 10. Other than doing porn, I live a pretty boring, normal life.

...............Now - here's my thing.........Personally - I neither approve nor disapprove of barebacking here on the blog (if you want my personal views - profile me) ......... I try to present it as objectively as possible....... but when I read an interview like this, it really makes my stomach churn and here is why.......

HE'S A LYING DOUCHE !!!

See - "pretty boy" up above got caught up on FILM what he does in his PERSONAL life. I do not believe for a second his whole "Friend caught HIV and it made me rethink" schtick.... and this quote is why....

"I was just kind of embarrassed that I did the bareback porn since I’m pretty safe in my personal life."

"Pretty safe"? - so what does that mean? He only barebacked as a top? He only bottomed bareback for people he knew and trusted? He spat not swallowed? He always peed after sex coz that's what the literature says to do? ........WTF???

..........The thing that happened - and as someone who used to work as a Gay Men's Health Educator in the 90''s - People involved in condom porn saw him, liked his look, met with him and then shamed him for what he did......... a tactic often used in the early days of HIV education. "If you shame them - they will stop - and then they will only fuck safe" - a line I *actually* heard at an HIV conference..... the interview above his is 'public repentance' so that he can get that contract with Titan or Falcon that will pay the big bucks for a muscled buffoon like him.......

.......Now if pretty boy wants to be a cumdump in his personal life - that's his choice. Only the most ignorant of imbeciles these days are unaware of the risks of barebacking. BUT for him to do an interview like that sends the complete and utter wrong message....

.........and it hinges on his use of the word "guilty" ......... basically he was caught doing something that he thought his peers would be upset about. That isn't a proactive health choice - that's a knee-jerk reaction to having been caught with his un-rubbered cock in the cookie jar..... This interview sent so many mixed messages you have to wonder how many different people in the room were telling him how many different things.........

...........and guess what - I'll bet a month's wages that he is totally shoving his cock in butts and sitting down on them raw right now...........

.........Hypocrite...............

.....and no I don't think porn stars are role models ......... but if you're going to be in the gay media...... which anyone can access via the web...... say the truth....... we have enough people pointing fingers at what we say and do without moron's like this idiot sending out four, five, or ten different messages...........

...........and to let you know - I've seen both scenes - and the man weren't acting, he was having a truck load of fun ......... makes you wonder...........

....That's my 2 cents worth, and I just spent it.......

.....What's yours?........

Damien
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....I'm A Barebacking Hypocrite...........

..........apparently.

I just got lambasted by some anonymous douche coz I said a vid on a site I was surfing at the time was hot - and it was a barebacking vid.

So ........... Mr Anonymous...... here we go........ you might wanna strap yourself in.

(1) You picked the WRONG week to tackle me on this one.

&

(2) Here is my honest to G-d stance on barebacking.

Number One first...... You anonymous people just make me puke.... get some cojones and get a fucking profile ya small cocked whining bitch.

Number Two - if you have READ MY FUCKING BLOG YA ANON ASSWIPE you would know that I have a very simple stance on barebacking...

If you bareback - routinely - you will get HIV at some point - FACT. However, I am not the condom police and I am not here to tell others what to do. But if you are going to risk your life - and potentially the lives of others - you might want to to talk to a doctor - or a person living with HIV - to know what sort of consequences your actions could result in.

Me - I LOVE IT!!!

I do - I love the feel of an ass sliding down my dick au naturel. I love the feeling. I love the spontaneity. I love the ease of not having to put up with lubes or condoms that burn or leave a rash coz of the compounds used in them. I LOVE IT ALL !!

But that's me - in a monogamous relationship. It's a luxury - I'll grant that.

Now..................... so we are VERY CLEAR.......

MY CHOICE IS MY CHOICE - YOUR CHOICE IS YOUR CHOICE - 'OWN' YOUR CHOICE THOUGH...... Talk to people.... know the risks..... know what the AFTER is like ..... and think carefully about what a little HOT FUN may do to a FULL LIFE......

And yeah - I love bareback porn - why............ Coz I do............

Meanwhile Mr Anonymous - the vid title had NO reference or inference in it to barebacking - so you must have watched the whole thing too.

So who's the hypocrite now ya double-standard piece of bird turd!

Excuse me whilst I go take a lie down.

Damien
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***UPDATE***

...Yes I realise this is another "angry" post - and that ppl have been worried about the rising level of anger on my blog.

I am going through a whole pile of shit right now that would have turned Mother Theresa into a bitch who would Zsa-Zsa every second person on the street.

And I'm a Clinical Depressive to add to the pile of shit.

So if you want "happy feely group hug" Damien from not that long ago - send me a "happy feely group hug" kind of topic suggestion and I will GLADLY do a post on something happy - *I* would like to do a post on something happy.

But if you think that right now calling me out on something is a good idea - I remind you that I am both an intelligent bitch, and the keeper of an extensive vocabulary - the very WORST of combinations.

And if that means I lose a few visitors - than quite frankly those people can kiss my fat, hairy, sweaty, Jew arse.

That's MY 2 Cents Worth on MY blog on quite frankly the week of hell in MY life.

Back to my lie down.

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